Default: JOY

Where have I been on this little space of mine for the last several months

So many thoughts, so many emotions and this is my most beloved way to express it all. With words on this blank canvas of a MacBook screen.

I have found over the past several months that when my thoughts are many, or should I say more than usual, the harder it can be to express exactly just what I feel. You know, those small squares that make up my life as seen through the scrolls (and sometimes trolls) of the social media world. That includes this blog, my own little corner diary of the cyber world.

I receive one question on Insta and Facebook more than any other. It isn’t always phrased exactly the same way but it always has the same face to the question.

Many different backgrounds. Maybe it’s the young girl. Maybe a single woman. A new wife. A mother juts beginning the new season of parenthood. Sometimes a ministry spouse. Sometimes it’s the infertile sister.

“How do I find joy?”

I know the answer, the only answer and it’s always the same. It’s Jesus. But there’s a big difference between knowing and doing. I know how to find joy but do I always look for it? And when I do look for it, am I looking in the right place?

No. As ashamed as I am to admit it, I don’t always find the joy even though I know exactly where it can be found.

Recently, I’ve found that my mind has been caught up in a fog. My mind has been on the receiving end of the emotions that seem to be residing in my heart.

Yes, I’m a Christian. Yes, I’m a Pastor’s Wife. No, joy doesn’t always come naturally. However, recently I have found myself on the receiving end of the encouraging words meant for another.

God has a special way of doing that you know. God has an indescribable sense of knowing exactly what our troubled heart needs and just when it needs it. You see, He cares about the littlest of sparrows and if He cares about them why should I ever doubt that my best interests aren’t always in His plan for my life.

I have no control over others but I do have control over myself. My words. My thoughts. My actions. My reactions. My joy. Or lack thereof.

God’s word tells us and on more than one occasion that by His stripes we are healed. I read that and immediately I find that my mind settles on physical ailments such as cancer, wounds, breaks, fevers and other sicknesses easily diagnosed and hopefully treated

But what about the hurts of the heart? The wounds that no-one can see.

He didn’t just take the stripes upon His back for the healing of the body, He took them for the healing of the heart and of the mind.

By His stripes are we healed, physically, mentally and emotionally.

A physical healing isn’t always obtained on this side of Heaven. But often times found in a Heavenly reward, granted by The Creator when the body is made whole, as eyes are laid upon The Savior for the very first time.

But an emotional healing, now that is one which can always be obtained on this side of Heaven.

I wish I could say that some thoughts, memories or even past situations could be erased from ones thoughts. Words better left unspoken could be just that, unspoken. That however is not the case.

Joy, though is always optional.

Joy doesn’t always feel like the most natural emotion to choose. Not when a veil of sadness feels as though it longs to consume the inner most thoughts and erase the peace that God longs to place within the spirit.

Joy doesn’t feel natural when hurtful words are spoke. It doesn’t feel natural when disappointments arise. It doesn’t feel natural when those the heart holds near are taken far sooner than the mind was prepared for. It doesn’t feel natural when the worst kind of diagnosis is spoken aloud. It doesn’t feel natural when the bill exceeds the bank account. It doesn’t feel natural when the arms that long for the weight of a baby are still absent of their desire. It doesn’t feel natural when loneliness knocks on the door. It doesn’t feel natural when the weight of pandemics and government issues seem to be ever on the arise.

It’s far more sensible for the heart to accept the default emotion of fear and doubt. Which is can feel far more easier than choosing joy.

I do believe my Biblical brother, Paul knew exactly what His Sister, Sarah, along with many others would experience many years after he found himself penning the letter to the church of Phillipi from a prison cell.

Contentment can be found in any state. Not geographically speaking but the conditions of life you may find yourself in.

And contentment and joy go hand in hand. Just like joy, lasting contentment can only be found in Jesus Christ.

Find Jesus, I mean truly find contentment in Jesus and joy is possible. Despite the circumstances of life, joy really is possible.

People cannot bring peace. Only Jesus. Things cannot bring satisfaction. Only Jesus. This, that, more and stuff cannot bring security. Only Jesus.

The sin nature of life has disrupted the beautiful plan of bliss that The life giver Himself has purposed for each and everyone of us.

I, as Paul have found that contentment (and joy) truly is possible in any state which I may find myself to be in the midst of.

Friend, hear me when I say that you were not created to live a joyless life. Life happens, but joy can happen too. Some things we have no control over, but we can control our joy.

It can be found in the faithfulness of God that I find myself waking up to every morning. As I pull my bedroom curtains open and the first rays on the morning sun smiles down upon my face, I’m welcoming the fresh dose of the new days endless grace. Unmerited. Undeserved. But most certainly welcomed.

It can be found as I watch the sparrow out my kitchen window, reminded yet again that if The Creator cares about the little animal, how much more He cares for me as His word reminds my weary soul.

It can be found in my hairs I find that old, time to be replaced hairbrush of mine. Why? Because God keeps track of just how many are still attached to my head. Who else could possibly know such a personal and intimate detail that belongs to me alone?

It can be found in the simple Psalm “Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation.”

It can be found in the knowledge that His love for me ran so deep, it ran red as my sins were washed away by the blood of the cross.

Because of Jesus, my reader friend, joy can be your default emotion.